Archive for July, 2009
Is Internet Dating For You?
by DIGauthor on Jul.31, 2009, under Dating
In recent years lots of new online dating services have appeared. But there have been some very negative stories associated with internet dating in the press and various magazines.
There have been many newspaper and magazine articles written that suggest online dating is really only suitable for desperate computer geeks. This is a long way from the truth.
One commonly held misconception is that online dating is inherently unsafe. The truth is that dating through an online service that requires membership is obviously much safer than dating a complete stranger who you’ve just met in a pub or club.
Many online dating services provide their members with sensible advice telling them how to make certain their dates are safe. Cost and commitment that is needed from members means that time wasters are discouraged.
Another common misconception is that online dating is only for computer nerds. The days when computers were only operable by technically qualified super-geeks have long gone. These days everybody is capable of operating a computer and enjoying the benefits that the internet can bring.
One magazine article I once read suggested that everybody using internet dating services was a liar and had made up their personal details. People can and do embellish the truth and misrepresent themselves, but people can do this anyway. People must always trust their own instincts when meeting people for the first time, but many online dating agencies will take steps to verify personal details as much as they can.
Another commonly believed myth is that online dating is really only suitable for young people. This is a bit like the idea that internet dating is only for geeks, this is simply not true. Internet dating has actually worked for many people of all ages. I have two close friends, both in their sixties, who met through online dating. He runs his own company car leasing firm and she worked for a well known van leasing firm. Their common work experience meant that they hit it off immediately and they are now planning their wedding.
Some people like to suggest that online dating is really only for the desperate and for people who are socially inept. Most people using these services are honest professionals simply looking for love and romance. They recognise the benefits that internet dating has provided by putting them in touch with like minded people. Another good friend who has found love and romance through online dating plays guitar in a popular local jazz band. He is also the owner of a well known local guitar shop. For him, guitars are his life. Internet dating resulted in him meeting a beautiful, talented lady who not only shared his interest in music and guitars but she is also a talented jazz singer.
And the final criticism that I shall address is that online dating is too expensive. Personally I would rather use the services of an expensive online dating site as this is less likely to attract time wasters. The cost of the service should be compared with what it would have cost in dinners and drinks to learn as much about your date.
Internet dating is anticipated to grow in popularity. It provides a cost-effective and time-saving way to meet like minded people with whom you stand a good chance of finding love and romance.
Getting Your Ex Back
by DIGauthor on Jul.31, 2009, under Dating
To be able to get back together with your ex girlfriend there are things you must do and here are a number of tips: Do not appear too anxious and needy. Although you feel anxious and you want to get back together with your ex girlfriend so badly, manage your emotions and just keep it to yourself. If you cannot help it then talking to a friend or family is a safe way to cry your heart out. Do not cry or plead in front of your ex girlfriend or follow her. Learn to manage your feelings and forget self pity because if you will appear too needy and anxious she will get scared and stay away from you more. Keep the communication lines open. Although she ended the relationship, just make her feel that you are civil with her and the communication lines are still open. Of course you do not have to begin the conversation incessantly or call her every minute to let her know that you want her back. But a laid-back hello once in a while is a nice start to somehow still communicate with each other. Evaluate what went wrong in the relationship. Of course there is a predicament in your relationship that is why the relationship ended. To be able to get back together with your ex girlfriend, you have to recognize the problems, analyze and find solutions. Remember the things that typically end up in arguments, fighting and misunderstandings. Are there needs not met? Is there something about you that she used to love but somehow you’ve changed and you no longer have those qualities she finds sweet with you? Maybe you get lost somewhere and deserted the relationship. Knowing what went wrong and how to correct it will be useful for you get back together with your ex girlfriend. mend a broken heart in, mend a broken heart book - Whatever information you want to look for, you can absolutely get it online.
Win Back Your Ex.-The Steps to Winning Back Your Ex.
by DIGauthor on Jul.30, 2009, under Dating
What do you do next?
We have been over thus far the following important topics including: emotional availability, honesty, level-headed, optimism, partner space, and falling in love again. Therefore now we will talk about the steps you need to take when trying to reconcile the relationship.
For similar links on a associated subject, click on this link to read Get My Girlfriend Back.
Get Your Ex Back Step #1: Evaluate Your Mood as well as Your Partner’s.
You have to determine if you are still irrationally angry at your girlfriend and the situation. Note that if you are still in a fighting temper, you must calm down before talking to her about your intentions. It is essential that you do not use the talk to attack your partner. Make sure you behave your best and have settled all internal issues before trying to talk. Note that this conversation is likely your last conversation with your partner so keep your temper down.
Is your girl still sulking? You must make sure to examine how your partner is behaving. If space has been given, it is important that you examine how he or she is feeling presently. You could try to talk to your mutual friends who still speak with your ex.
Get Your Ex Back Step #2: Commit to Taking Your Share of the Blame.
Whatever may have happened between you two, put it out of your memory. A fresh new start means accepting that you can’t redo history, and that moving forward is your best bet. The person who ended you two doesn’t really matter at this point. The important thing is that you want to move on without looking back.
Your significant other will feel better if you make it clear that you will not continue to blame them for the troubles you two have had. Believe it or not, you can really thwart the process of getting back together by insinuating that your partner is responsible for 100% of what you two have gone through.
Get Your Ex Back Step #3: Go on a Date With No Strings Attached.
Don’t make your invitation out to be something to be feared. Furthermore, don’t make him or her feel apprehension about the date. It’s preferable to use common friends to issue the invitation, but if you don’t have those, then just do it yourself.
Arranging a nice and neutral date is to ensure that you will only talk about subjects your partern feels willing to discuss. Be genuine on your date and think of it as a regular date, not as an opportunity to promote your agenda.
Your mission is to make the other person comfortable; saying things like ‘It’s time we finally put this to rest’ will only make things stressful. Just have a great time instead of focusing on getting him or her back.
Get Your Ex Back Tip #4: Get Your ‘Conversation Token’ Ready.
Be able to discuss topics that are brought up such as the past and mistakes you made, even if you may not of planned to bring them up yourself. Know that you can use the conversation token to try to moderate the conversation when these things are brought up.
The one thing that is the best representation of your relationship is your conversation token. This token may be rings, concert tickets you attended together, pictures, etc. . Even though it can be anything, be sure it is meaningful.
Get Your Ex Back Step #5: Speak Then Listen.
Of all the parts of the make-up process, this one can be problematic. How can you keep yourself from dominating the conversation? How can you prevent your ex from screaming at you?
You can keep things civil by setting out some ground rules. When the conversation token (see the fourth step) is in your hands, you have to make your best effort to avoid getting angry, passing off blame, or reacting poorly . Also, you have to state clearly that theh person who has the token is the only one who is able to talk.
If you follow this process, you’ll be able to compromise with your former partner. Furthermore, by doing this, you and your ex will see that you can start over and begin a relationship again in peace.
Be aware that no relationship is absolutely perfect; and even great relationships have tough times. If you buy into the perfection standards, you will never be happy with your relationship.
When to look for outside help?
We have thoroughly examined ways to help fix your relationship on your own. However, now is time for you to be open to the idea of seeking outside help. Know that there are multiple sources of self-help reading material to help you win back your love. However you have to be open to investing the time and effort, as well as money into making your relationship work.
To complement this article you’ll find other articles on a associated subject, this link is clickable to gather information on Review - Win Back Love.
A Guide to Getting Your Girlfriend Back.
by DIGauthor on Jul.30, 2009, under Dating
How to win her back by being open with her emotionally.
Guys, it’s time to talk about sharing your feelings and how doing so will help you get your girlfriend back after breaking up. This concept is designed to describe how people make their emotions know to others. Regardless of how you grasp this concept, what is important to understand is that being emotionally available means to learn how to speak and listen to sincere feedback from other people.
For more pages on a comparable subject, this link is clickable to learn How to Get Back Your Girlfriend-Part 2.
Perhaps the best way to describe emotional availability is to list what will happen if you don’t open yourself up. I hope that this talk will enable you to plan how you’ll win back your girlfriend, even if you two have had arguments in the past.
If you don’t become emotionally available, you will…
1.Tell lies about how you feel.
One of the primary reasons why guys don’t open up is the fear of conflict. You probably believe you’re helping her out by not telling her how you feel when she complains, or when she doesn’ t respect you. Did you know, however, that lying just one time will open you up to further untruthfulness later in your relationship.
Being insincere because you’re afraid to open up will make you feel guilty. Eventually your entire outlook about your relationship will shatter under the guilt you have hanging over you.
1. Produce confusion.
With almost all women being very intuitive, your girlfriend will more than likely be able to know what you genuinely feel, even if you refuse to tell her yourself. Be aware that if you clam up without providing an explanation, she will assume things. If you refuse to give an explanation for your clamming, your woman will not be entirely sure that something is wrong even if she sense it.
3. Destroy your girl’s trust in you.
For example, your woman may ask you about her appearance . If your girl asks if something makes her look hefty and you refuse telling her how you really feel, she will know. Note that these same principles are applicable in discussing more serious issues like your relationship. By avoiding being forward in your answer, your girlfriend will be left feeling upset. Your girl expects you to be truthful and will not understand if you are avoiding truthfulness.
It is important for you to express your willingness to be more honest with your girlfriend in the future if you wish to win her back. Avoid making your lady take a guess at what you are really feeling or intending.
Recalls the infamous quote that the truth will set you free and be sure to apply it to your relationship.
If this article pleased you you’ll find more links on a comparable subject, click this link to read Getting Her Back for Good - a Review.
How Not Overreacting will Help You and Your Ex Get Back Together.
by DIGauthor on Jul.30, 2009, under Dating
As you may or may not know, when people try to get back with their partner, they frequently fall victim to an ugly behavior known as overreaction. Understanding this concept, though, first involves comprehending the nature of overreaction, and how it probably led to you two not being together.
For other links on a comparable subject, click this link to read My Boyfriend Cheating.
This may be tough, but you should do it. It’s important to reminisce about the things you two did in your relationship. When I say memories, I’m talking about all those times you two exchanged words over nothing; those times you didn’t feel a connection; and the times when you may have run off after a fight to take a breather. Since you’re trying to put yourself back in his life, all those fights and arguments play a big role. The main reason for this is so that you’ll finally comprehend how overreaction to a tiny problem was bad. You will also grasp how the issues that provoked your fights weren’t worth it.
You have to realize that it wasn’t the issue, really; instead, what caused your relationship to tank was how you handled it. Overreaction is how you let your feelings take charge and how you did away with rationality.
To demonstrate this further, here are some “if only” lines you probably said at some point.
“If only I didn’t yell at him when he was trying to fix that one thing…”.
“If only I let him explain, instead of toss him out after he was late…”.
“If only I didn’t fly off the handle when he made a joke about my cooking…”.
“If only I had been understanding when I caught him talking to a girl he used to be with, instead of just going off half-cocked…”.
It’s not possible to go back to the past and somehow repair what was already done, but it is definitely possible to use this lesson to reunite with your ex. Cut the drama from your life, listen to him, and try to understand what he’s telling you. Remember, your ex is a human like everyone else, with emotions and reactions.
Your boyfriend may have had incredible patience with you, and may have treated you well, but there’s a limit to what he can handle. Too much drama in relationship is too much for a guy to manage, more than likely because men aren’t raised to handle women when they’re being too emotional.
If you want to get good at getting your boyfriend back, you have to understand the contrast between what’s real and what isn’t. You can’t continue to romanticize the fight because at some point you have to understand that a conflict can ruin your love.
Women generally love the concept of being pursued by guys even when emotions are flying about, like in movies. In reality, though, men definitely don’t see the passion in times like these. They just halt in place and stay quiet, or get angry and leave.
If you enjoyed this article you’ll find similar links on a similar subject, click on this link to learn about Get Him Back Forever - a Review.
Free Tips to Help You to Have a Successful First Date
by DIGauthor on Jul.30, 2009, under Dating
In this article I give free tips and advice to help people to have a successful first date. I hope you find the information interesting and beneficial and wish you luck on your first date.
Before I continue I would just like to make it clear that I do not work in the “relationship industry”; I am in fact a speech coach who offers stammering advice. I myself suffered with a terrible stammering (some people call it stuttering) problem for eighteen years of my life.
Many people fully admit that going on a first date can be a very nerve-wracking problem; it certainly was for me. We all know that they can take a rather long time to choose what clothes to wear and even whether they are going to turn at all.
The location of the first date
This is what I consider to be an ideal location for a first date. When I take out a woman for the first time I normally take her for a couple of drinks first at a bar. After about an hour I would then if she didn’t mind of course, take her to watch a film at the cinema. After the film I would then take her for a couple of more drinks.
There is a reason for this madness! Firstly it is not really appropriate to go straight to the cinema without a bit of conversation first. As this is the first date, there is a good chance that the conversation could go a little stale after an hour, hence it's time for the cinema. During the film you will have plenty of time to think of lots more interesting topics to discuss and even if you are unable to you, you can always talk about the film when you return to the bar.
In the early days of a new relationship it can sometimes be difficult to find something to say; well it is for some people. If therefore, on your second date, you find that you are in this situation then all you have to do is to start talking about the fim that you watched on the cinema.
When your are talking whilst having a couple of drinks, make a point of spending more time talking about your date rather than yourself. Show a big interest in what they have to say even if you are finding it boring. Laugh at their jokes even if they are not funny, you get the idea!
Tell the truth
When talking about yourself it is a good idea to tell the truth, that is if you want the relationship to last. As time goes by your partner will find out a lot more about you and if they realise that you have lied, they may then find it hard to believe and trust you in the future. What is a relationship without trust? Answer, dead.
Always smile
There is nothing worse than going on a date with a person who is constantly moaning about things. Be happy, be bright, always smile and talk in a positive rather than negative way.
Instead of worrying about how the date might go, I would advise you to look forward to it. You never know this one may turn out to be the real deal. Good luck.
Tips To Find A Man
by DIGauthor on Jul.30, 2009, under Dating
The most important thing you need to do when shopping for a man is to look in the right place. Knowing what you are after is obviously very important. It’s possible that making a list might work for you.
Click Here To Visit The Woman Men Adore and Never Want To Leave
Whether or not you want children is an essential question. How many otherwise strong relationships broke down because one party wanted kids and the other did not? Sometimes it is best to have a slightly more hard headed approach to potential matrimony and meet up with someone who already shares your interests and hopes. If you are not the motherly type, dating a guy who wants to play happy families may not be a great long term prospect.
This also goes for other things. If your interests include dancing, socialising and drinking you may not be best off looking for him in the local ornithological society.
Being receptive to a man’s interests is vital to breaking the ice of the conversation. Being keen on a man frequently means being interested in his interests, so take care! Of course it is good to have some diverse interests and hobbies, as long as there is plenty for you to rub along with. Some mutual areas of agreement are pretty vital for sustaining a healthy relationship, however. If one of you is devoutly religious and the other is not, may it put a burden on your relationship at some point?
Once again, ask yourself what you are wishing for in your partnership. If all you are after is a brief relationship then ignore what has been said, but if it is not, you need to think carefully about the limitations of an attraction based purely on a cute smile.
Getting friends to help you out doesn’t have to mean being sent on a blind date. Maybe you could suggest dinner out with a group of friends. Also you’ll have the advantage of being in a ‘neutral zone’ rather than someone’s home which might help foster a greater sense of intimacy in conversation. Meeting for drinks before going on somewhere else, may be an opportunity that your friends can provide to help you find someone of mutual interest.
If you do meet at someone’s home, however, here are a few tips. This may be obvious, but sitting hunched up on the sofa, staring into your drink does not send out ‘come and talk to me’ type of vibes! Be friendly and open yourself up to people’s field of vision. Try and think of things you have in common beforehand, if necessary, if you don’t like polite conversation very much. It is all too easy to freeze in these situations if you are not really used to them, or worse still, become a gibbering wreck! Be
where most of the people are in order to talk to as many as possible. Pouring the drinks for other guests may prove a good way of meeting and chatting to suitable men!
Discover Want Men Really Want From A Woman
Plain and simple has it place, but if you are seriously on the look out for another man you need to glam up. Sometimes, you will meet someone without expecting to, so paying more attention to your appearance will not go amiss.
Just to say it once more, be calm and smile! How many times has a smile been the thing that has attracted you to another, so try doing it to them. Nobody’s saying you need to adopt a rictus like grin, but at least don’t look unhappy or depressed. People who feel comfortable and happy with themselves tend to be the ones who have the most success in personal relationships, no matter how conventionally attractive, or financially well placed they are in life.
What You Need To Know About Senior Dating
by DIGauthor on Jul.28, 2009, under Dating
A senior by definition is a person who is elder than you, or an aged member of the society.
Dating is defined as a word that describes romantic courtship between two people who might or might not expect marriage as an end result.
Hence, the romantic courtship between two who are considered seniors or aged members as well as the romantic courtship between two where at least one person is considered an aged member of the society is referred to as senior dating.
Seniors don’t necessarily have to be above an age of sixty People of above the age of – for instance 40 are also considered seniors.
Depending upon many of the various senior dating services offered (especially by means of online senior dating), the age group targeted may vary. However, generally- senior dating is for those who are above 40 years of age.
Senior dating allows the seniors who maybe divorced, widowed or are still single, an opportunity to meet people of the same age group and to share ideas and interests or if a deepened bond occurs between two, a relationship. This allows them to enjoy life- just as they did when they were younger.
As mentioned before, there are various senior dating services offered in the World Wide Web.
There are usually few photos in the profiles of those who are registered for these senior dating services; this means those who have uploaded their pictures have an obvious advantage over those who have not.
Also, some of the features offered in senior dating services include anonymous email, instant messaging, chat rooms and forums.
When using these senior dating websites, one should make new friends, and communicate with each other appropriately – so that through friends, compatible partners can be found. There are several precautions that should be taken if one decides to meet those whom you’ve contacted recently and don’t know much about- outside the online platform. The first precaution is to always meet up in public places where there are many people around. Another precaution you can take will be to inform someone you trust about where you’re going and with whom and by any chance if you start feeling uneasy with the person whom you are with- make sure to be polite and make your exit. These precautions are general safety measures but since it is better to be safe than to be sorry, it is better to stick to them.
If the services are used properly, senior dating will be a successful way that lets those seniors who are divorced, widowed or with children to reconstruct their lives and have a nice time.
So You’re Thinking of Getting Divorced?
by DIGauthor on Jul.27, 2009, under Dating
I have witnessed, both within my own family, in the outside world and in my practice, what can happen in a relationship if there is no common bond that can actually bind a couple together.
Well, let me digress (or maybe, progress) and say a bit about getting together as a couple in the first place: even if there is a strong attraction, be it physical, mental or emotional: Love; That does not seem to be enough to keep a couple together; the body will wither, the mind will change and the emotions will flutter. And love may turn into a dependency or habit. Unless, there is a third entity; the glue that binds the one to the other; the bond that binds, a mutual goal and lifetime commitment to it. To see you through the inevitable tough times, you will need something greater than both of you; a driving force that can take both of you, like a boat down the river, or an ark during a flood …
In my opinion, there are two good bonds; children and Religion or a Spiritual Practice (to be more politically correct, or any other proven external disciplinary way of life that both parties agreed to commit to whole-heartedly, abide by, follow and emulate; the goal). There are, of course, no guarantees even if both of these are there, but the chances are multiplied exponentially.
Without these, there is no common bond; it’s just two people living separate lives together: convenient for a nice meal, some ambience, safe sex, and the occasional meaningful conversation …
So, the intent or lifetime goal of both parties must be the same. Otherwise, both sides will be resentful, because, in any situation, for any important decision, no compromise can satisfy both of the parties, because their primary motivating goals are different; or they have no primary motivating goals and “just don’t feel like it” at the time. And so there is no improvement in the situation and resentments, anger, etc. build; and there is no possibility for a long-term relationship.
A tendency towards negativity, insecurity and fear/anxiety may sometimes seem to obscure love. But this is who the person is at the moment; and they are perfect the way they are.
Love may sometimes seem to be obscured by a tendency towards not wanting to be so depended upon by the other, for their happiness, security and emotional wellbeing. But this is who that person is at the moment; and perfect the way they are.
Much of this may stem from residual family entanglements. Some behaviors may come from family control issues. Some behaviors may come from family insecurity issues.
There are a few key issues that need to be kept in mind: Trust! Honesty! One must trust the other, as the right hand trusts the left. And one must be honest and trustworthy, inside the relationship and in the world at large as well; trusting yourself, being honest with yourself and trusting your partner and being honest with your partner, and being trustworthy and honest in all your dealings in the world. In other words, your thoughts, speech and actions should always be in line with a clear conscience.
There are times when you will feel rejected or abandoned, based on your perception of the situation. There is usually no reason to feel this way; from the other’s standpoint, it’s not about you, it may be about their family control issues.
At times you may feel that you would appear weak if you give in to the desires of the other. There is no reason to feel weak by giving in: remember the bond that binds; you can show your compassion and accommodation of what may be the other’s family insecurity issues.
Besides the above mentioned, or perhaps, because of the above mentioned, there may be a lack of real compassion and empathy on the part of both parties for each other. To see the world from the other persons heart and to trust the other person, that they are doing the best they can. To see them as perfect, the way they are. (That’s not to say that there is no room for improvement.) To realize the person is always more important than any ideology or material object or goal; the relationship comes first.
Perhaps ask; what’s the worst thing that can happen if the worst thing happens. In most cases, upon sober reflection, the answer is; nothing very devastating. Again, the third entity, the bond that binds, the trust in that everything that happens is only good.
There is a need for genuine compassion and complete acceptance of the other as perfect as they are; acknowledgement and acceptance of each others needs and idiosyncrasies and the commitment and willingness to live with them as they are, for as long as they are that way. Which, if you ask me, and as has been proven millions of times in the present and throughout history, cannot be accomplished without the “third party”, the bond that binds one love to the other.
The other person; their feelings, hopes, dreams, goals must be your own as well: you are one; heads and tails of the same coin. One person, soul, living life in two bodies.
It says, “All beginnings are difficult”. And while this may be so, heading in the right direction, with the right foot, for the right reasons, towards the right goal, will ensure that the trip will be worthwhile and pleasant for you and for all of those who love you …
Abraham Bruck is the developer of the Universal Healing Technique and the UHT Lifetime Trauma Resolution Protocol.
So You’re Thinking of Getting Married?
by DIGauthor on Jul.26, 2009, under Dating
I have witnessed, both within my own family, in the outside world and in my practice, what can happen in a relationship if there is no common bond that can actually bind a couple together.
First let me state the not so obvious: a strong attraction, be it physical, mental or emotional: Love; Does not seem to be enough to keep a couple together. Why? Becuse eventually, the body will wither, the mind will change and the emotions will flutter. And love may turn into a dependency or habit. Unless, there is a third entity; the glue that binds the one to the other; the bond that binds, a mutual goal and lifetime commitment to it. To see you through the inevitable tough times, you will need something greater than both of you; a driving force that can take both of you, like a boat down the river, or an ark during a flood …
In my opinion, there are two good bonds; children and Religion or a Spiritual Practice (to be more politically correct, or any other proven external disciplinary way of life that both parties agreed to commit to whole-heartedly, abide by, follow and emulate; the goal). There are, of course, no guarantees even if both of these are there, but the chances are multiplied exponentially.
Without these, there is no common bond; it’s just two people living separate lives together: convenient for a nice meal, some ambience, safe sex, and the occasional meaningful conversation …
So, both parties must have the same intent or lifetime goal. Otherwise, both sides will be resentful, because, in any situation, for any important decision, no compromise can satisfy both of the parties, because their primary motivating goals are different; or they have no primary motivating goals and “just don’t feel like it” at the time. And so there is no improvement in the situation and resentments, anger, etc. build; and there is no possibility for a long-term relationship.
A tendency towards negativity, insecurity and fear/anxiety may sometimes seem to obscure love. But this is who the person is at the moment; and they are perfect the way they are.
Love may sometimes seem to be obscured by a tendency towards not wanting to be so depended upon by the other, for their happiness, security and emotional wellbeing. But this is who that person is at the moment; and perfect the way they are.
Much of this may stem from residual family entanglements. Control issues coming from the family of origin may be the cause of some behaviors. Some behaviors may come from family insecurity issues.
There are a few key issues that need to be kept in mind: Trust! Honesty! One must trust the other, as the right hand trusts the left. And one must be honest and trustworthy, inside the relationship and in the world at large as well; trusting yourself, being honest with yourself and trusting your partner and being honest with your partner, and being trustworthy and honest in all your dealings in the world. In other words, your thoughts, speech and actions should always be in line with a clear conscience.
There are times when you will feel rejected or abandoned, based on your perception of the situation. There is usually no reason to feel this way; from the other’s standpoint, it’s not about you, it may be about their family control issues.
At times you may feel that you would appear weak if you give in to the desires of the other. There is no reason to feel weak by giving in: remember the bond that binds; you can show your compassion and accommodation of what may be the other’s family insecurity issues.
Besides the above mentioned, or perhaps, because of the above mentioned, there may be a lack of real compassion and empathy on the part of both parties for each other. To see the world from the other persons heart and to trust the other person, that they are doing the best they can. To see them as perfect, the way they are. (Of course, there is always room for improvement.) To realize the person is always more important than any ideology or material object or goal; the relationship comes first.
Perhaps ask; what’s the worst thing that can happen if the worst thing happens. In most cases, upon sober reflection, the answer is; nothing very devastating. Again, the third entity, the bond that binds, the trust in that everything that happens is only good.
There is a need for genuine compassion and complete acceptance of the other as perfect as they are; acknowledgement and acceptance of each others needs and idiosyncrasies and the commitment and willingness to live with them as they are, for as long as they are that way. And to accomplish this, we need the help of a special “glue” to bind one love to the other. A “third party” that has historically been present in all successful marriages. And continues to be a vital element in marriages today.
The other person; their feelings, hopes, dreams, goals must be your own as well: you are one; heads and tails of the same coin. One spirit, one soul, split off into two bodies.
It says, “All beginnings are difficult”. And while this may be so, heading in the right direction, with the right foot, for the right reasons, towards the right goal, will ensure that the trip will be worthwhile and pleasant for you and for all of those who love you …
Abraham Bruck is the developer of the Universal Healing Technique and the UHT Lifetime Trauma Resolution Protocol.